May symbolize a state of self-awareness.
Killing yourself or committing suicide is actually a hopeful dream symbol signifying transformation. What you are symbolically killing are parts of yourself which you deem undesirable. These qualities are the things that are keeping you from pursuing your goals with full focus and confidence. So even just the attempt of killing yourself already shows your determination to polish your personality and bring out the best parts that would help you become more successful and accomplished.
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